Domestic abuse is any incident of threatening behaviour, violence or abuse (psychological, physical, sexual, financial or emotional) between adults who are or have been intimate partners or family members, regardless of gender or sexuality. 

Examples of this behaviour are 

• Psychological/emotional abuse – intimidation and threats, for example towards children or family pets, social isolation, verbal abuse, humiliation, constant criticism, enforced trivial routines
  
• Physical violence – slapping, pushing, kicking, stabbing, damage to property or items of sentimental value, attempted murder or murder
  
• Physical restriction of freedom – controlling who the victim or their children see or do, where they go, what they wear, stalking, imprisonment, forced marriage
  
• Sexual violence and abuse – includes a range of different behaviours, including sexual assault or rape. Regardless of any relationship between victims and perpetrators, this violence is still a crime 
  
• Financial abuse – stealing, depriving or taking control of money, running up debts or withholding benefits or bank cards.

Domestic abuse can also include forced marriage and so-called “honour-based crimes”. 

There is a difference between an arranged marriage and a forced marriage.  An arranged marriage is an acceptable tradition in many communities, where both families work together to arrange the marriage. However, the decision to get married relies entirely on the two people getting married. 

Forced marriage is not a religious or cultural issue, it is an abuse of human rights and a form of domestic abuse.  Forced marriage means that you do not have any choice and that your family is forcing you to go through with it, often using emotional or physical abuse.

So-called honour based abuse is violence and abuse carried out in the name of family or community “honour”, when someone is believed to have shamed or dishonoured their family or community. This is a form of domestic abuse. Some people try to defend their behaviour as being part of their culture, however, there is no excuse for controlling a person’s actions and choices. 

If you or someone you know is affected by domestic abuse our help and support page offers details of the organisations that you can turn to, or if it is an emergency, call the police on 999.